ye shuhua should not have existed in this world.

 

under the night sky with stars hidden by the clouds in their sadness, as the rain fell down to earth like tears of the sky god himself, shuhua was born in a place that no one would even call a home or a neighborhood - the slums. born to a e mother who got pregnant by a rich man (a married one, at that) who merely wanted company for a single night that became two that gradually turned into weeks, shuhua definitely did not have the best childhood out there. 

 

she grew up with bruises and injuries that came from no other than her mother, who blamed her for the customers who refused to choose her for having gotten pregnant, thought that releasing her wrath upon the child was the best thing to do in their already cruel life. shuhua had always blamed herself - why did she even have to be born? her mother could have aborted her instead of giving birth to her. why did her father even allow her mother to keep her?

 

no one wanted her in this world anyway.

 

she had tried to kill herself too many times, to lift a burden off of her mother's shoulders, to try and escape the hell she was living, yet she managed to stay alive no matter what did. (or perhaps she did not really want to die. perhaps she merely wanted someone to save her.)

 

getting the chance to study by using the money her father had been sending her (trying to do his role as father, she supposed, but she'd have to say that he was failing at it miserably.), it was at school where she had discovered her talent and love for acting. the ability to be someone else even for just a temporary time was just too good for her to refuse, as she had wished her whole life not to be shuhua and become someone else instead.

 

this was what had made her pursue acting as her career, and at the age of fourteen, she had been casted as an extra in a movie. because of her acting skill and natural beauty, she had quickly garnered fans and that was the start of her acting career.

 

however when she was sixteen, her mother got sick with std, after all the ual activities she had done in her life, and soon after, she died, leaving shuhua with her aunt. shuhua's resentment for her father increased tenfold, though she supposed that the man would have no reason to meet the woman he did not care about on her deathbed. 

 

she then moved to korea with her aunt to work under 24 hours entertainment. it was there in korea where she had met her step-sister, song yuqi, her older sister from the man who was doing a poor job of being her father. the first time they met, they were already not on good terms, and so when shuhua discovered that yuqi was her step-sister, her hatred for the older woman increased. shuhua makes sure that none of her personal feelings appeared on the surface, however. that was where her acting skills became truly useful.

shuhua wants the world to think of her as an angel, a sweetheart who is always kind no matter the situation. a generous lady with a heart too big for her body. and it is how everyone sees her, actually. to them, shuhua cannot hurt even a fly. 

 

in reality, she is very blunt and is prone to using impolite (or even abusive) language toward others. without her facade, she is an empty shell, cold to others and very hard to approach. she is quite arrogant as well, taking pride in the fact that she has reached where she is through hardwork and hardwork alone. she does not show this side to others, however. and she will do anything and everything just so it stays that way.

 

she lies. she lies all the time and sometimes, she does not even notice that she is lying. she knows that no one will her for who she really is, and she does not want that. she tends to lie to herself, deceive her own emotions, just so she can perfect a lie and make it believable.

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timezone is gmt+8 and i'm mostly online! if you have any questions regarding the rp, feel free to hmu through pms!

my preferred genres are angst, drama, romance and fluff. third pov is preferred and i don't mind how long the starter/reply is as long as it's detailed enough for me to reply to easily. plotting > winging. rooms > walls > pms. plotting must be done through pms.

poke me only after 10 days of not replying. any earlier, i'll ignore. it's not that i forget. it's either i don't have the muse or i'm busy.

you can refer to me as nana or as my muse's name, i don't mind! hmu if you want to be friends. i don't bite!