It's a nightmare to watch your mother die.

It's even worse to be her own murderer.

He's deranged, they say. After all, what demon other than insanity would have tempted a 16-year old boy to put a gun to his own mother's head, shoot a bullet - shattering fragments of bones and splattered memories, smeared against their white-washed walls? Death is instantaneous. Akira watches without so much of a blink of the eye, as Sugiyama Hisako bleeds out — until life leaves her veins and the cold blankets over her body perpetually. The gunshot had masked the last breath his mother had taken, it is the only thing he hears ringing in his eardrums. It's ironic, how his mother's name had meant "long-lived child" but had met death in the hands of her own son at the age of 38. At 16 years old, Akira says goodbye to the hollowed halls of his deteriorating home and learns to live with the brand of a "Mentally unstable, troubled and violent boy". Death was never kind. Being alive was a lot crueler.

The story spreads like a wildfire; media was the catalyst, fabrication and exagerrated testaments formed the demolition team that turned a 16 year-old boy's life into nothing. He stops becoming Sugiyama Akira and starts being nothing but his own mother's murderer. They were lenient though, due to his tender age, (if lenient was months of endless therapy and white padded walls and subtle statements that meant nothing but "you're crazy, you're crazy, you are ing insane.") Akira ends up a troubled child who let his demons get the best of him; killing his own mother. The stories never stop coming. The rumors never stop coming. Somewhere in the middle of therapy, Akira vanishes. The stories don't stop coming, the rumors don't stop building even when he's nowhere to be found.

Somewhere hidden, he finds salvation in a man that teaches him how to survive. Two years were spent learning from an ex-military colonel who thirsted for revenge. The years had hardened a shakened soul, drilled apathy and control into every aching bone, drenched clean hands in red. Akira was made to learn and breathe close-combat, he focused on bone breaking, knowing exactly where to press for a heart to stop and how to choke. His hands were the only weapon he had needed, but that doesn't stop him from shooting the man who took him in right in the face.  The town is shaken when he comes back after two years. He comes home a man with death swimming in his eyes, death waiting at the tips of his fingers. Sugiyama Akira was Midas but instead of turning everything he had touched to gold, he turns them into ashes.  Survival was a game Akira knew how to play well.

What Sugiyama Akira is:  (i) a prideful (will most definitely lead to his downfall), sleepy-eyed teenager with a death grip, (ii)  a controlling, extremely apathetic son of a , (iii) painfully selfish and untrusting, (iv) someone who will most definitely die in a battle solely dependent on long-range combat  and (v) Hiroshi Isoroku's murderer. 

What he's not: Sugiyama Hisako's killer.

It's a secret he'll keep and bring to the grave: the quiet sound of 'thank you, Akira' leaving past his mother's lips before he pulled the trigger. 

PLOTS

to be posted.

author notes

Timezone is GMT +8. Online essentially every day but replies come sporadically. Triggers such as violence and abuse (emotionally, physically and mentally) will most likely be present. I primarily write bull in the form of detailed para where aesthetics is heavy and my character's mind is put into focus. This is because of his character and because I am comfortable with it.

“ you see the layers when you tear yourself apart. ”