+ urs

urs !

Personal thread room for Jaebum x Jessica.

Im Jaebum 4 months ago

he knows that every word stings, but his mouth keeps slipping while the fire in his eyes continues to burn. he could see the woman crumble in front of him. the happy smile immediately disappears into a desperate line. her colorful eyes slowly fill into devastating tears. the life in her is no longer there, and he is the culprit of such crime. there is clear defeat in her actions, but he doesn't know whether to feel guilty or not, whether to feel ashamed of his actions, or whether to feel proud of what he told the young girl. he dislikes being a liar, so he knows that jessica has always been his second option. she is the leftover after his parade with nahee, and he is sure that jessica realizes this for quite some time. there are a few who has tailed him and delivered the word that he is an , a , a jackass, and much more, when it comes to jessica. he said that he is honest, but suddenly, he feels that lying is the best option for the two.

his throat grows drier and drier as the tension intensifies. he doesn't want to look at her anymore, seeing such a fragile heart shatter into millions of pieces. he swallows in attempt to relocate his calm, but he is unable to. his head is dizzy now, and the unrecognizable music pounds his head despite hearing nothing. "you," he grumbles, releasing a small sigh. her figure slowly begins to disappear into the crowd, but he manages to reach out and grab onto her small shoulder. "you. why did you do this to yourself?" he almost wants to laugh at what he is saying. really, what is he saying? "you're better than this," he continues. before anything else, jessica was his best friend. someone who came to him whenever he was in need, someone who spent time with him during lunch breaks and classes, someone who knew about him more than he knows about himself, but he could never seem to figure out on why she is so desperately in love with him. "you know this well," he attempts to drag her back.
Oh Jessica 4 months ago
@Im Jaebum every word of jaebum’s was like a bullet piercing straight through her soul. but then again… when was it not? even when they were blissfully ignorant of their situation, jessica had always been second-guessing their relationship. it was all guessing games to her and she was guessing every gaze, every action, every sentence of his. she’d spend endless nights trying to piece together where his head was, losing herself in the process because she was so hopelessly in love with him. he’d break her heart into tiny little pieces, and she was still picking them up and putting them back in his hands. she was destroying whatever was left of her by waiting foolishly for him, breaking her own bones in an attempt to make him love her the same way that he loved nahee. but that was impossible. because kim nahee was im jaebum’s entire galaxy and jessica wasn’t even a mere planet. in his vast universe... was she even a single star?

she only realizes she is crying when she can feel the wetness on her cheeks. when suddenly the world around her turns blurry and the ground below her feet seems to be falling in. when their friends come over in concern, not realizing the intensity of the fight the couple is in. she blinks a handful of times, dabbing away at her tears with her delicate fingers. she doesn’t know what to say. in that moment, jessica can only let out a bitter laugh. he’s right - what was she expecting? for him to stay with his rebound when the love of his life is literally right in front of them? for some cliché young adult love story where he suddenly realizes that he loves her too? she wishes she could wish pure hell upon him. she really does. what’s miserable is that she keeps making herself believe that she could be with him, and that he thinks of her as much as she does with him. but he doesn’t. of course he doesn’t. but her heart refuses to believe that and makes up a love story in her delusional head where he loves her like she’s always loved him.

“you’re right,” is all she manages to mutter out at first. the defeat evident within her voice. “i’m not her. i never will be. i knew you were still in love with her. and i willingly let you use me. the fault is on my part.” the corners of her lips curl upwards into a bitter smile. she lets go of her hold on him, instead opting to reach upwards so she can run her fingers through her hair. “i… i just wish it wasn’t you, you know? because out of everyone, it had to be you. it had to be the person who i had the best memories with, who was my best friend, who i thought was the sweetest thing alive. but of course… you had to be the one who broke my heart.” she lets out a shaky breath and looks down at the ground, twiddling with her fingers nervously at what she’s about to do next. “i’m sorry. have fun. get home safe.” and with that, jessica turns on her heel and heads towards the exit.
Im Jaebum 4 months ago
@Oh Jessica "what?" slips out of his tiers. he is beyond confused. within their period of dating, jessica has never voiced against any of jaebum's wishes. however, her tone isn't pleasant. to be exact, it is almost nerve-wrecking. "what did you just say―" and there is it. the ticking bomb inside of jessica explodes like no tomorrow, and jaebum is hit with every blast. his eyes immediately shifts to his supposed lover, and he narrows them. his eyebrow arches in bewildered, completely astonished by her sudden switch from full happiness to complete anger. suddenly, the music feels slow, a rhythm so slow that he can hear himself breathing, but his breathing is disturbed by jessica's blasting temper.

he can see it so well. he can see the fire in her eyes, burning away all of the limitations that jaebum has put on her. though, her fire isn't destructive―it is emotional; it has a combination of fear, anger, and love. all three motives in which can persuade someone to do something so reckless. he hears everything that jessica says, but he couldn't comprehend anything. he is still so blinded by nahee, so in love with a woman who will never be his. he doesn't realize it, even with days, hours, minutes of jessica saying 'i love you' to jaebum. he returns it with a smile, but it feels so unreal. as if it isn't natural, as if he doesn't really love jessica as much as he does with nahee, and he knows far too well that it is the truth. his lies seep through so easily; jessica discovered this fact already, but for some reason, she accepted his desperation. now, the consequences are coming.

"are you ing serious right now?" he grumbles. the false warmth disappears immediately, and anger slowly boils inside. "what do you have against nahee? what has she ever done? so what if she broke my heart? or whatever the you think it is? honestly, you should be grateful that i even looked at you," he releases a small scoff, "i dragged you here to have fun, so i can forget college, friends, everything. but i'm sorry for wanting for see nahee? is this what you want? an apology? i loved her for 's sake. honestly, i can't get over it―i really can't. there is still something about her. i don't know what the hell it is. to me, she's perfect. and you happened to be here―" he sharply exhales, briefly closing his eyes, "you're just not the same as nahee. you probably never will be."
Oh Jessica 4 months ago
@[SH] Im Jaebum [10/28] [] IT'S OK BB NO WORRIES SAME HERE


her answer is short and blunt, and there is a new fierceness in her tone that she never knew she possessed. her eyes have shifted from smiling crescents to voids of pure anger. her cheerful grin from seconds ago has curled downwards into a nasty scowl. truthfully, she has no idea how her demeanor changed so quickly. but she realizes where she is going with this and it scares her. but she lets herself continue, lets her body run on autopilot, because she knows she is about to lose him, and at this point, she has nothing more left to lose.

“are you serious, jae?” her voice is strained, her eyebrows furrowed together, and it’s clear she’s disappointed in him. “look. we both know that you’re the love of my life but i’m not yours. and that’s just that. there’s nothing I can do. i can’t make you love me the way i’m in love with you. and that’s fine. you can break my heart. break it a thousand times if you’d like. it was only ever yours to break anyway.” she swallows her pride, her lips starting to quiver as she continues. “but i truly always wanted the best for you. god, i do hope you find that someone. but nahee? ing kim nahee, who’s only ever used her bare hands to claw your heart out of your chest and crush it? the one who walked all over you, disrespected your feelings, and laughed with her dumb clique about it after? are you serious, im jaebum?”

“i watched it all. i watched you fall in love with her, no matter what she did to you or said to you. how much she hurt you. i watched her break your heart. how she threw away the pieces, one by one, as if you were nothing but another pathetic boy. you know i would have done anything for just one of those pieces, for just a tiny spot in your heart. for just a part of your love. i would’ve given up everything. and yet, even after all that. even after the months i spent building you up again… it’s still her? you’re abandoning me in the middle of a party you dragged me out to?” jessica is absolutely livid now, her hands on her hips and tears forming in her eyes. she lets out a bitter scoff, “for her.”
Im Jaebum 5 months ago

there is a pressure on his chest, but he isn't sure if it is jessica, or the feeling of despair. he couldn't stare away from the magnificence of his former lover. he could repetitively call her a goddess, but that goddess is tainted by an unknown figure. he sees the way how close she is to the companion, the way how she laughs at every wave that she moves, the way how her hair sways back and forth to the rhythm, and the way how happy she looks in such dark setting. she shines so brightly―it is almost blinding. suddenly, he feels empty, as if there is a void inside of him. though, he is used to the feeling, but it is worse this time. perhaps, he's jealous? or he hasn't moved on yet? clearly, he hasn't. jessica is only here to feel that void temporarily―no matter what he tells himself every time.

his focus is pulled away from the scene. he realizes who is attaching to him. it is jessica, but there has always been a feeling that never trails away from her. the feeling of sadness, the feeling of loneliness, the feeling of need―he is the reason to it, and he knows far too well. but even then, nahee and jessica aren't the same person. nahee was different, perhaps she still /is/ different. it is something that the woman in his arms can't complete, no matter how many times she has tried to do so. it will never work.

he emits a sigh, "i need to see someone." his answer is nonchalant, but it seems so cold, so distant. "please, i'll be back," he follows after. his hands rest on her biceps in attempt to peel her off, but he does it gently, hoping that everyone else will mind their business. "jessica, please," he begins to plead this time. god, anything to see his reason of motivation, even if his heart will shatter afterwards―anything to see the woman of his dreams and nightmares.
Oh Jessica 5 months ago
@Im Jaebum she barely hears jaebum’s question, too caught up in her own thoughts and worries. it takes a moment for her to process it and form a coherent answer, however, so she turns around a second too late. opens so she can reassure him with a ‘nothing’ but she freezes when she realizes he’s no longer looking at her. and even before he utters a small curse, jessica knew.

she knows because she recognizes something all too familiar in his eyes. he was staring straight ahead, to the younger woman across the room, to the entire cause of his demise. and in his eyes… was love. jaebum was looking at nahee the same way jessica had always looked at him. she knew he’d set fire to the world around him, willingly walk into those flames, if it meant it wouldn’t burn nahee. and it broke jessica’s heart, just like the countless other times she watched as the light slowly disappeared from his smile, the sparkle in his eyes going away with it. jaebum’s smile seemed forced now, like it hurt him to produce one. it used to be the easiest thing in the world to do, to make him smile. his smile that would light up any room the moment he walked in, the one jessica was so terribly in love with. jaebum was losing himself and becoming a shell of the person jessica knew. the pain nahee had inflicted on him was getting to him, seeping into his soul, and jessica worries that this time she might not get him back.

in a desperate attempt to keep him with her, jessica puts her can of beer down on the nearest surface, wraps her arms around his waist, and leans her head against his chest. she pulls him closer to her. anything she can do to block his view of his ex, anything to create a barrier between the two. to others, it seems like a romantic act of affection between the couple. because they can’t hear past the booming of the speakers, because jessica whispers only so he can hear. “please don’t go.”
Im Jaebum 5 months ago
@Oh Jessica he could barely hear himself. the loud music, the constant chatter, the lousy cups; god, there is some things that he doesn't miss about parties, and this is one of the few. even with his slight despise, he enjoys the environment. he couldn't help but giggle alongside his companions, specifically the woman who is his. the room radiates immense heat. he is sweating so much, but god, his girl looks better than he does. his daze focuses on jessica. her eyes beam with such happiness. he returns the touch and laughs against her scented skin as the music grows louder. there is a brink of tipsiness in his laughter, his digits attempting to control the alcohol within his hold. he takes a sip with her and rolls the liquid inside his can. he winces at the taste. there is a reason why beer is his guilty pleasure.

his body sways towards jessica, and his arm loosening around her shoulders as he chats with the people nearby, but he notices a difference between the two. her small digits on his waist tightens, and he glances at the source. his eyebrow raises in confusion; it's likely that there isn't a problem, but he needs an answer, or perhaps, his tipsy self simply wants to know everything that is occurring. he leans down to the female's height, and his lips part to speak near her ear. "babe, what's wrong?" he makes sure to adjust his voice at a reasonable volume. he returns to his previous position with a concerned smile, scanning the area to locate some disturbance, and his eyes happen to land on a familiar shadow. "oh―" his jaw drops and his throat dries.

ing hell, it's nahee.

in an instance, his heart aches. he knows what's coming, and he knows too well. "," is the only thing that slips out of his mouth. he croaks a nervous laugh, his sight still attaches on his ex. she looks the same, but if anything―she looks even more gorgeous, under such chaotic lighting with the disgusting reek of alcohol. everything about her is gravitating; her hair running down her shoulder, and her dress flowing with the beat. somehow, somewhat, her image is so pleasant to look at, even if she is swaying with another man. actually, that hurts him.
Oh Jessica 5 months ago
@Im Jaebum it’s a friday night. music is blaring through speakers. colored led lights are flashing. sweat’s grinding on sweat. red solo cups are strewn everywhere. and jess? jess is somewhere within the middle of the crowded living room, wrapped in the arms of her best friend as they converse to their group of friends. she is brimming with so much happiness that it radiates off her skin and makes her shine in the crowd. she’s not even sure what her friends are talking about, but she could care less as she locks eyes with jaebum, leans in to nuzzle his nose with hers, and breaks into dulcet laughter. she’s so caught up in the moment, completely immersed in her own euphoria and the feeling of being tipsy. she takes another sip from the can, closing her eyes and relishing the feeling of being so happily in love. she is convinced nothing can ruin her night, not when she has everything she’s ever wanted within her grasp. but of course she’s wrong… because when she opens her eyes, she sees Her.

her. kim nahee. jaebum’s ex-girlfriend and probably the love of his life. the same woman who brought jaebum to his greatest highs and then proceeded to tear him down until he was a skeleton of the soul he used to be. she’s off in another corner dancing on some random guy. she’s smiling, clearly enjoying the moment. and jess hates it. she hates how nahee can be so unaffected while jaebum still struggles to recover from a breakup that happened months ago. jaebum… he hasn’t seen her. and for ’s sake, jess sure hopes he doesn’t. she turns back to look at him, so oblivious. so happy. jessica’s heart pounds wildly in her ribcage and anger floods her system. how dare nahee show her face here knowing fully well that the host was a mutual friend of theirs, knowing fully well jaebum would attend? unconsciously, jessica’s grip on his waist tightens slightly. she wasn’t going to lose him to nahee. not now… not ever again.


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cancel 3 months ago
reaccept dawg please
Queenofsins 3 months ago
I have a question about second Charas
First is the non Male ban lifted? Because my first is female so I wanted to get a Male
Second the public room thread atm I only have threads in those hidden rooms do I need to get one in a public room too or do they also count?
And Third I have to make an advertisement blog no problem with that at all but like when it come to HTML I have two left hands so dose the blog have to be made pretty or can I just make it like a blog post about the rp and how it is and why I like it?
Oh and need help to make a desicion because right now its between park junhee because someone recomend him to me or Huang Jingyu. I need a chara that looks like he can be both top and bottom so I'm still a little between chairs on who
darkdesires 3 months ago
hello hello, could I have Selena Gomez added for me please? Thank you
athanasiax 3 months ago
please add and reserve lin yun. thanks!
lucky4432 4 months ago
hey, can i reserve min yoongi if he’s available?
ProudShawol 4 months ago
May I have park jimin
LilithPrincess 4 months ago
Hello, could you add & reserve the japanese model Rina for me please? :3
athanasiax 4 months ago
I would like to join but I just created my account and I can't upvote yet D: I keep forgetting my password for rr huhuhu is there some way I can prove I'm not a creep second profile for more characters kind of little person? Q n Q
Naheehee122 4 months ago
Can you add and reserve Kim Nahee for me please?
hanabira 4 months ago
u w u the upvotes and favorites are on nice round numbers now
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