Drama Room

@Lee Felix (the director) (MY HEART ahhhhh)

*My chest seems to heave up and down dramatically as if I ran a marathon though it was just a few steps out the store, the cause of my racing heart and temporary hard breathing was our conversation and where it would lead us. It was nice to finally be alone with you in this alley where I could think and that my attention could just focus on you, it felt like we were in our little bubble now and the outside world didn't exist anymore. I let out an airy laugh and nod at your statement about things being scary, that you read my mind so easily or at least felt the same thing too.*
No, no, no I totally get what you meant that we might hurt each other, the whole relationship thing can lead up to those moments. mm...*Stops talking and hums as I was thinking of an answer to the shoulder question, though it made me smile, that it seem I was your trusty number one person to go for problems and emotions.*
I can pretend to be someone else and you can cry on that shoulder~
*waves both my hands in front of myself to dismiss that joke and gives you the real answer*
I will make sure you will have more shoulders to cry on, just in case that happens. But you can always come to me for anything that you can.
*Smiles gently as I take in a deep inhale, while our eyes seem to finally lock onto each other. As you continue to say what's on your chest and what you were thinking, I knew where this was ending up and I gulp softly, my feet became cold at the thought of us dating, but mainly the thought of messing the relationship already and losing you. I am frozen in this moment now, your words seem to echo as you spoke or maybe I was just replaying the options you listed out for me over and over again. *
Felix....
*All I manage to say or murmur was your name, the conflicting choice and the sweet things you were saying, made my chest ache. Things get quiet again, I was struggling to speak to you once again and I felt myself get sweaty or maybe it was just in my head, I just felt I was dragging out the silence for way too long and felt bad for you in this picture.*
I-I uh......
*I step back a little bit so my back would touch the cold wall and could help support me in a way.*
Think I need to...think about this for a bit...
*I knew my answer already, I was just a coward with saying it to you at this moment, that I needed time to prepare myself to say it to you.*
Is that okay, can I get a day or two...to think about it....to think about getting into a relationship or not....I-I'm sorry...
*I dip my head down by a little bit, my eyes locking down onto random rocks and junk on the ground between us.*

@Kang Seungyoon /For a moment, as you stay silent, I can hear my own heartbeat in my ears, the panic creeping up the back of my neck and overwhelming my whole being. My eyes shoot from one side to another before finally zeroing in on your chin -a safe spot to look at, it seems- getting a sort of tunnel vision. What would happen if you just got up and left now, without saying a thing? I couldn't blame you - not for any of it, really, yet I can already sense my heart breaking, regardless of what I've said about being able to overlook my feelings.
I couldn't even begin to express the gratitude that swells up in my chest once you reach out to me again, even if that's to rather harshly bring me out, even if to scold me. I'd go wherever your hand would lead me, like a child, not minding the stray cat's aggression, instead being entranced and distracted by its fluffy fur and the pretty eyes.
I watch you as you speak, my own eyes soft, giving you the time to express yourself with little nods of my own./
/For a moment I just stay quiet, my mind picking and choosing the words you've said, arranging and re-arranging them as I try to sort out my thoughts. I can feel myself mouthing the phrase "I like you too" as my eyes fall down, yet I can't gather myself to form a response or understand my feelings. Eventually, though, I reach out, my hand a little shaky as I keep my eyes to the ground, hoping you'd take it and help me stay present once more/
I understand, Yoon.. It's scary because I know what you have been through in the past and.. and it makes my heart break, thinking about it-- I would hate myself forever if I were to hurt you-- /my words are small, teeth coming to chew on my bottom lip as I still avoid your glance/
And it's also scary because I don't want to be hurt either-- not because I think you'd hurt me! but just.. relationships in general hurt sometimes, right? And if we were ever to hurt each other somehow.. Who's shoulder would we go to cry on after? /I feel like I am rambling, my words not really going anywhere and I feel like I'm about to spiral down the rabbit hole, all of my thoughts forming a knot that's not letting me see things clearly. Where was I going with that? With a deep breath, I finally look up at you, my eyes a little scared as I search your own before speaking again/
However.. I trust you more than anyone else in this entire world, Yoon. I think it would hurt -- both of us-- even more if we were to pretend that our feelings didn't exist. I think- and maybe I'm biased- that we would regret opportunities that weren't given a chance. /With that, I send you a small smile, still a little shy and unsure but it's genuine at least/ The what if's are scary as . But they can be hopeful too. When I-- well.. The first time I realized I liked you more than just a friend was when we were just cuddling together, laughing about some stupid stuff-- I watched you laugh and smile and, Yoon, it made me so incredibly happy, to be able to make you laugh like that. And to laugh together with you and feel my tummy start to hurt from all of it-- I thought "What if I'll get addicted to his laughter?" and "What if his presence will finally make me appreciate my life?"--

@Lee Felix (the director) *I glance to where you finger was pointing on the menu, taking note of what the flavours were, and hums in thought, I return my gaze and smile at you.*
It sounds super yummy and looks rather interesting, well everything seems to look interesting.
*tilts my head, holding my hand up as I press the second knuckle of my index finger to my plump lips, sometimes running my finger back and forth slowly without realizing.*
Heh, you would look good in glasses if you were ever wondering, probably those cute and big round frames.
Oh and I think I am 100 percent settles on the chocolate, strawberry coconut one.
*When watching you tense up and panic, naturally I worry and reach out my hand out to your arm over the table. I lower my hand down onto the table when you seem to collect yourself or at least gain some courage to say what you desired to say.
My heart stops when I hear you like me, and I feel my body freeze as you keep going on. I flicked my gaze onto yours, wondering if this like statement means what I think it means, do you like me more as a like and friend? I don't flinch when you touch my hand, and instead I gently hold yours in return while locking my gaze on yours, taking deep breaths with you. I quickly recall the kiss and it felt so strange when I could feel warmth suddenly on my lips because of it.*
*I wanted to speak up, I feel like some idiot and coward once more as I am frozen in this fear when you just confess your feelings to me, something that should be good to hear.*
*I wished our hands didn't separate as I grasp for nothing and bring my hand back to my lap.*
Felix...* Finally I could manage to utter out some word and sound from my tightened throat. It felt harder to say what I had on my chest in the public environment, I was concerned that it would bring attention to us if I were to say it right here. I swiftly get up from my seat and take a hold of your arm just so I could pull you outside into the alley. Once we were there I let go of your arm and pant softly while looking at you*
I'm sorry, I just....I couldn't talk in there....I ....this is a lot for me and I can't seem to think straight and I don't know what to say....
But...*glances down to our feet as a memory of our kiss brushes back into my mind then your words just a few minutes ago.*
I....I think I enjoyed our kiss we have and ....I think....I like you too....I'm just scared of things, scared of the what ifs and messing what we have...You know? *glances back at you with a slight frown.*

@Kang Seungyoon /any response that pops into my mind is way too.. intimate and cheesy for the occasion and I will all of them down - the last thing I want is to spook you now. Hence, I just shake my head a little, sending you a goody grin before letting my eyes roam over the menu once more, the amount of options overwhelming me a little. I eventually point at one of the pictures, turning my menu toward you so that you could see my choice as well/ mmm this? It kind of looks like the bolognese sauce because of the colour, right? But it's actually um--
/squints a little, briefly pulling the menu closer to my face to read out the description/ strawberry, banana and coconut-- oh that's pretty good! /blinks up at you once more before giggling softly/ I think I should probably invest in glasses now. What about you, which one caught your eye?
/my eyes dart down to your hands, you seem tense. for a moment I am tempted to quit the topic altogether -- as much as I yearn to tell you what's been on my mind recently, I also don't want to be selfish and make you uncomfortable. My teeth abuse my bottom lip for a moment longer, my vision narrowing as my breathing gets a little heavier, some elements of panic settling in. I take in a few deep breaths and rub my hands over my face, eventually relaxing enough to speak, my eyes trained on your face as if to gauge any reaction you might have to my words./
I know you probably don't want to hear these things but.. I think it will be easier for the both of us if you do. Seungyoon, I like you. As my best and closest friend, who has been there for me anytime and everytime, helping me through whatever life has been throwing at me, yes. But also, I like you as a man -- /this statement seems to take all the air out of my lungs but I force myself to take another collection of deep breaths to continue, reaching forward for your hand, not to be romantic but rather to ground myself as I speak/ when you kissed me.. I felt-- It felt right for me. I've been wanting you to do so for a long while. But.. I understand if it didn't feel the same to you -- you don't have to feel the same. I understand. I just think you deserve to know how I feel--
/I bring my hand back to myself now, playing with my fingers as my voice cracks a little with the new words/ I can overlook-- overcome my lo-- my feelings if you give me some time, if that's what you'd like. But.. Don't shut me down from your life, please-- I-You- You're the closest person that I have-- and the one I trust-- and need- the most-

@Lee Felix (the director) *my lips contort into a lopsided grin at your comment and casually reaches my hand over to caress the side of your head*
Aish I can't do that, don't think is gonna like me nor would want me around you anymore. Mmm you high on something right now???
*Laughs with you and shakes my head as I retract my hand back to my side.*
*Once we were seated and handed menus that was filled with quite a few options and pictures for what our spaghetti icecream could end up being like, I take my time reading through every option till I could find some I was interested in. Drums my digits along the back of the menu and hums.*
Well what kind of spaghetti is Felix gonna try?
*I don't notice you staring at me just yet, only when I hear that sort of serious comment of yours is when I lower my menu and swallow my saliva down quietly.*
Mmm....
*I nod slowly and give the menu a tightened grip for a brief second before I lower it completely flat on the table so my hands could be free.*
What would you like to talk about?

@Kang Seungyoon /blinks several times as if trying to confirm my answer to your question before handing it to you, but the lights and bright colours really have me hypnotized in one spot. My gaze flickers over your facial features and I can hear my heartbeat pick up in my ears the longer I watch you. This would be a perfect spot to kiss you -- is the thought that comes to my mind and I can't help but blush at it, hoping you wouldn't notice. Another kiss is the last thing we need at this moment, I couldn't risk losing you again like that/
nope, not okay. you might have to contact my mom and tell her "sorry ma'am I unintentionally got your son high. oh no, no, he didn't do drugs, he just looked at some neon lights" /I break into laughter as I imagine you actually doing it. I finally sit down at the table and tilt my head at the menu, humming in thought/
welpp, I am definitely getting the ice cream that looks like real spaghetti. They hooked me up with that
/my hands lower the menu then to look at you, teeth coming to bite the corner of my bottom lip as I take in a few deep breaths. I know we can't ignore what had happened between us, even if that seems like the easier solution/
and.. If it's okay.. There are some things I would like to talk to you about, Yoon--

@Lee Felix (the director) *not expecting you to come up close to me and press your finger to my lips, instantly freezing me in my stride and causing my heart to flutter as I lock my dark orbs on yours. It was pathetic how easily you push my buttons as my eyes try to steal sneaky glances of your lips, remembering when we kiss and the memory snaps me back to reality as I gently lower your hand. I return a smile of my own and pat the top of your head.*
My bad then, and Yoonie has got it now.
*nods with a soft hum when you quietly thank me and takes a moment to glance at this interesting shop, not expecting it to be so busy and fancy with all its interior. Doesn't take notice of your touch on my forearm, more like I become distracted when you look at me and laughs at your comment.*
You all okay~? *raises a brow when you focus on me for a bit and nods at your comment*
its a match made in heaven, they gotta match each other.
*guides us further inside till a waiter proceeds to show us a small table for us with menus. I sit down on one side and take the menu to scan all the wild things that this shop would have.*
mmmm what to get~

@Kang Seungyoon /I watch your back as you turn away from me, biting my lip as if I am given the opportunity to appreciate your frame without you knowing. My eyebrows furrow a little at your words though and I tug on my hoodie strings with a gentle groan, the sound more playful than what would've been ideal for the situation but I can't help it. I didn't want you to feel guilty or apologize. In fact, what did I want? In a way, I wanted us to be like we used to be before the kiss - joking around and being serious and then joking around some more. On the other hand, though.. My heart had been longing for more for a while now. I groan again, coming closer to you and pressing my finger to your lips/ Shhhhh, why are you apologizing? It's just me, Yoonie.. Same as I've always been /I chuckle, my gaze failing to appear stern, looking rather comical instead. I so desperately seek for you to feel comfortable around me again, it's almost pathetic. I wonder.. Are you experiencing all of these dilemmas too?/
/I slip through the door, muttering a soft "thanks" before I stop in my tracks at the visuals that greet me inside. The store looks.. nothing short of crazy. Loud music, weird sculptures, all kinds of lights, neons, crazy colours, and textures on walls and floors and ceiling. Without thinking much, I reach out to you, hoping to hold onto your forearm as I turn my face to you, eyes wide/
God, I feel like I'm on drugs. /I chuckle, tilting my head before glancing around once more. I try my best to tear my eyes away from your face, despite how pretty the colourful lights seem to illuminate your features. Not the time, Felix. Not the time/
I guess it makes sense that crazy food is sold as such a crazy place, mm?

@Lee Felix *arches a brow when it seems that I have spooked you from the idea of cold noodles and laughs softly.*
Can't believe I talked you out of that, I got a way with words and your imagination comes in play with it too~
*I grab my wallet and keys as you already step out, and before unbuckling myself I take in a deep inhale of courage. I join you outside of the car and shop, though I quickly noticing you fidgeting with your fingers, and naturally I know or assume you felt nervous or uncomfortable at the moment. I try to not think you were uncomfortable and at least hid my emotions behind a gentle smile.*
*My head tilts and motions to the shop and I turn to head over there first only to stop to look back when you call out my name. I hum softly and I get nervous when I see you taking in deep breaths as I pray that nothing bad or serious will occur*
I......
*thrown back by your words and your voice, I take a moment to process what to say*
Of course, I apologize for the difficulties Lixie. *smiles apologetic as you look up at me, my eyes searching yours and I hope that everything is and will be okay.*
mhmm lets slurp some cold noodles~ *I attempt to make a joke as I head over to the shop and open the door for you*

@Kang Seungyoon /Looks through the front window, trying to imagine what you're describing before shivering a little bit, my features twisting briefly./ uh on second thought.. maybe I don't want them to keep their shape while you eat them. That kind of just sounds like.. noodles but frozen -- I don't know how I'd feel about that. /Shivers some more, my nose scrunching as my mind travels through all the possible scenarios, maybe a little too serious for the topic of ice cream. But I am happy to be distracted like this- way happier to discuss ice cream than think about the difficult mess of feelings and tension that we clearly have between the two of us/
/My hand lifts away from your thigh at your reaction, my teeth catching my bottom lip once more. Have I done something wrong? My heart skips a heavy beat at this - maybe you don't want to be touched by me anymore... You didn't seem to enjoy the hug before either.. This will be a difficult one to swallow for sure. Sending you a quick smile I nod, leaving the car and rounding it to wait for you, fidgeting with my fingers a little. How do I act now that I'm not sure what is happening between us?/
Seungyoon-- /calls out once we're both out, looking down at my feet as I take in a couple of deep breaths/ Please.. Let's not be awkward like this.. I don't know what to say-- or do.. when we are like this-- /my voice breaks a little in the middle of my sentence and I bite my lip painfully, sounding a lot more hurt and miserable than I have intended. I can't help myself, though. I manage to eventually pull myself together, clearing my throat and looking up as if I haven't been on the edge of breaking down just moments ago/ mm. Let's go?

@Lee Felix *drums my fingers against the wheel as the sweat begins to form on my nape, the silence seeming to drag on and wanting it to end very soon though I knew I held half the responsibility to unbreak it.*
*I relief that I had asked the right question, and that you ended up discussing more about this ice cream contraption.*
mmm that's a really good idea...I wonder that too.....It would be cool and amazing if it kept its shape. Then imagine slurp cold noodle shapes.
*When I end up stopped at a red light intersection, I take a quick glance over at your phone, my eyebrows pop upward on my forehead.*
Oh....it really does look like spaghetti for sure, I am very very curious now with this. wonder what other flavours and combos they make with this. like imagine chocolate noodles with chocolate sauce or something like that.
*pays attention to the road again when the light turns green and knows that in 3 minutes I would be at the location finding a parking spot for us. Not fully paying attention to you at this moment, my leg jumps and clenches against the other one simply from your touches on my thigh. I get a little fluster and steal a quick glance with a sheepish smile*
its no problem, I am happy to go with you.
*finally we reach the spot, and I find a parking spot to pull into.*

@Kang Seungyoon /I'm not sure how much time passes as we drive in silence and I look to the side, watching the road, my lip bitten as I think. Was I wrong to text you today? Maybe I pushed you to meet me before you were ready? But I don't get too much time to think about it all as you break the silence and I turn my head toward you instead/
mmmm flavours.. not really- but what I am most curious about is texture. Like. It looks like spaghetti right, but like.. does it keep its shape as you eat it or is it just ice cream squeezed through many little holes and it mushes together as soon as you spoon it? /My voice sounds a bit more normal as I speak of this, some hints of playful smile finding their way back to my lips. I take out my phone and scroll for a bit before I find the picture I was looking for, turning my phone to you then/ thiiiis is the image that captured my attention, mainly. It looks like actual spaghetti, right?? Ah, I'm so curious--
/with that, I lock my phone again, biting my lip as I glance over your side profile, my hand reaching out for a moment, unsure, before It settles on your thigh, patting it briefly/ Thanks for going with me-

https://sc01.alicdn.com/kf/H36354b8563894601a33a8c887b9b6f09r/223263379/H36354b8563894601a33a8c887b9b6f09r.jpg

@Lee Felix *I wasn't sure if I saw it right, if I was overthinking but I could feel that your smile was forced and I wonder if you wanted to give us a go but now that you are in, you are not enjoying it anymore. I hope I wasn't forcing you to pretend to be okay and happy on this adventure of ours. *
*As we drove in this dead silence, causing my hands to sweat against the steering wheel, I steal a few glances at you when I could, thinking what to say to break the ice. I wanted the silence gone but was afraid of saying something wrong and ruining things for us two.*
mm....*drums my digits against the wheel and smiles gently* Did you check the menu for the place? Is there some flavour that has caught your eyes?

@Kang Seungyoon /As I glance at you from the passenger seat, I can see you avoiding me still, even as we sit here together and in a way it feels like a punch in a gut. I knew you would probably be like this, but seeing my imagination come true hurts me regardless. My smile drops a little and as I lean to put my seatbelt on, I brush the hoodie sleeve over my lips subtly, wiping the shimmery substance off, feeling stupid for trying to appeal to you like this./
Yeah-- Yeah, Let's go. /I murmur, trying to squeeze out a smile at that. I stare straight ahead when we start driving, chewing on my bottom lip, hands folded in my lap. I'm not sure how to act anymore and the silence is quite drowning, giving me a little too much time to be alone with my thoughts/

@Lee Felix The moment I see you walk out, I panic at first only for it decrease when I see how bright you were smiling and how contagious it was that I was mirroring it.
My heart skips a beat so easily, just from the way your arms feel around me and of course the sudden hug as I gradually lift my hands up to rest on your back, taking a moment to enjoy your company and touch.
Mumbles back with my usual deep and husky voice as I dance small circles along your back with my digits.
'mm...it has been..."
Clears my throat when we pull back and adjusts the rear mirror as an excuse as to not look at you and to end up flustered already.
"Shall we head out for an adventure?" Glances quickly to share a warm smile.

@Kang Seungyoon /I pocket my keys and wallet before leaving the dorm, not able to suppress my bright grin as I spot your car. Lifting my hand, I give you a quick wave before I make my way to the car and seat myself in your passenger seat/ Yoon! /Whatever nonchalance I was planning to show before seeing you is now gone, replaced by my genuine happiness - I've missed you a lot, that's clear. I throw my arms around your shoulders, straining in the passenger seat, rubbing my cheek to your shoulder/ Ahh it's been.. A while /I murmur, squishing you briefly before pulling back, boyish in my nature/

@Lee Felix Chuckles at the reply, thinking it was meant in a joking way and hums when you send the information for me. Once I get it, I send a quick message to let you know I am on the way before grabbing my keys for my car. I take a few deep breaths as I buckle myself in the car and grip the steering wheel, hoping tonight will go smoothly.

A few minutes pass and I park in front of your dorm, I shoot you a message. "Yoonie has arrived~"

@Kang Seungyoon (hehehe)

"wooow, Yoonie, I am offended .-."
"my dorms are here --" /are the two text messages that you receive, together with a pinned live location. Crossing my legs, I flop down onto my bed, mindlessly scrolling through some apps as I wait for your response. Without much though I can feel myself start to fidget - my fingers a little restless. I can't decide how I should treat you once we meet? Should I pretend that nothing has happened or should I be blunt and open once we get the ice cream and the timing is right?/

@Lee Felix (why is Felix so cute ono)

I glance back at my phone when it makes a sound and hums at your reply, I quickly reply back.
"Wait wait, what's your address silly?"
This time I don't put the phone away or close the messaging app, I didn't want to end up missing your message and then have you wait at home because of it

@Kang Seungyoon /your text reassures me, and although a part of me knows that you're most likely doing this more out of obligation than actual wish to see me, I can't help but feel my heart flutter at that. It's been a while and there's no point denying that I feel /some type of way/ around you - you make my heart jump and I can't help feeling excited over the prospect of seeing you soon. "Sounds good! I'll be ready in a few minutes:)" i send this before glancing back at the mirror and brushing some of my hair back, hoping to fix it enough to look presentable. My ear is decorated with a couple of long, hanging earrings, not really suitable for the occasion but I like the way the tiny little silver chains catch the light. After another brief moment, I add a bit of some pink lip balm to my tiers, making them look plump and soft - am I being a bit over the top? I try and push away the nagging thoughts of why exactly I am trying so hard to look good for you right now/

@Lee Felix (I realized there is notifications in the room for everyone else, like no room post for bystanders just for safety so I will send a pm when I sent you a reply XD)

Thankfully this was over text, I could imagine myself hesitant and even picture my voice cracking, instead, my thumb hovers the keyboard as I take in a deep inhale as I make my decision. I tap into the message bar " Mm yes I am free too. Should I pick you up from your place?" I send the message after a moment of pondering before my shoulders would slump down, I was nervous with meeting and seeing you again after that kiss we had shared.
The phone is slipped away safely in my pocket as I blindly comb my fingers through my dark bangs, hoping I look good.

@Kang Seungyoon (I keep missing replies in this room :( )

"I'm free now, what about you?:)" /is the text message that I send before throwing my phone onto my bed and diving into the closet. What outfit would say "I liked kissing you but it's ok if you regret it, bestie"? I manage to snicker at the thought. Something casual, right? After a bit of pondering I pull out a lavender hoodie and light wash jeans, the clothes making me look comfortable and soft. Would you like that? I shake my head at this thought. Why would you care about my clothes,right?/

*after work had finished, I went to go buy some sweet comfort food, as I had been more stressed out than usual now at work, with the whole stalker thing happening. I glance around my surroundings and end up sitting down, rolling down my paper bag to take a bite out of my cinnamon roll.*

@Lee Felix I felt myself freeze upon reading your message, wondering if it would be a good idea to go and of course I couldn't let you go alone and scared. I ponder on a decision while chewing at my plump lip as I read over the text a few times.
With a deep inhale,I gain the courage to reply back, hoping it would sound nature.
"Mm, of course. When would be a good time for us to go?"

@Kang Seungyoon (Also, don't worry about it!!!)

@Kang Seungyoon "Right!!! It looks super weird in the pictures, but.. good weird? Should we try them out and judge them? I'm curious but scared to go alone"
/that is not entirely true, but as close to truth as I can manage at this point. Your quick response brings a smile to my face - at least you didn't feel like ignoring me and I appreciated that. We don't have to talk about the kiss after all, right? Mindlessly, I stand up, walking around the room for a bit, my mind drifting off, back to that moment. To your lips and how my heart jumped once they have touched../

@Lee Felix *The moment I slip my phone it vibrates and ends up making me jolt a little bit from it, I look at the notification to see it was you and don't know why my heart was skipping a beat.*
"Hey Lixie, huh icecream noodles? I never even knew that was possible. What is the place called."
After sending the message I relax my shoulders while letting out a sigh of relief, it was just a regular conversation and there wasn't anything to worry about

@Lee Felix (ahh I didn't know you replied to this orz I apologize)

@Kang Seungyoon /my fingers have been fidgeting with my phone more and more in these past few hours. I can't forget the look on your face once you have kissed me - it was full of regret, at least that's what it seemed like to me. And what did I feel? I was torn. It felt right to kiss you, but.. how could It possibly be right? I can't have a relationship. They hurt - eventually they end up hurting, and I don't want to be hurt. But would it be so different? I am already hurting without talking to you - it's been a big change and my heart sinks whenever I think of it. Do you even miss me around? Maybe the best course of action would be pretending that it has never happened. With a big sigh, I open the texting app and find your name/ "Hey, Yoonie. Have you seen the new noodle place? They do ice cream noodles :D"

@Lee Felix *Two weeks have passed and I have yet called or seen you, and here I was sitting alone and glancing at my phone once again with my eyes locked on your contact. I needed to call you....I needed to see you before I broke the promise and hurt you. I was scared of calling if you wouldn't pick up or maybe it was too late, or what if I forget what I want to say. I sigh and slip the phone back into my pocket, knowing I had retreated again like a coward though I cant help it.*