second Best

I'm always second best

second

second

second

best.... 

but maybe I'm just meant to fill in the spaces that most just leave behind.

I'm always outing myself last and putting others before me...

the only thing I seem to ever get out of it is Loneliness and abandoned words spewed by the mouth that's raised me. Spewed by anyone who has ever just said "oh ITS here."
 

and yes I am IT

IM IT. So hi there IT. Yeah family is actually a messed up concept to me...but I also know that sometimes no matter how bad... I'm always going back. In which I'm just setting myself up for more sadness... but it's like I really don't have a choice right now... and yes I recall someone telling me things take time... 

how much longer? I take my shot and always come up just short... and than I'm back to square ing one... and my family "still needs me" 
 

I love unconditionally, but now I'm starting to think "what next?" More heart ache like the heart ache that's been engulfing the ing whole world? 
 

well it.... I'm stubborn to ya know~ so I can't give up... not yet~ but I'm so tired of feeling like I'm a useless soul rotting in a bag of flesh blood and bone! 
 

**just a needed rant, perhaps someone can relate? Idk. I try to keep things to a minimum around here but might as well use my blog for "poetry and lyrics and feelings" every so often. I feel ... ok... so hope others are feeling "ok" too <3 fr **

~Diablo