I Actually Miss You

...In that dutifully suspended moment when light fractures across the blinds, spilling leaflets emboldened in splendor over cutlery carved cheeks.
...When dawn's tawny fingers cross the skies to interlace the moon's gossamer veils in pardon. A chase that spares little else than Fate's sadistic amusement.
...When the sheets tangle at the furl of my toes and time suspends itself in pause amid this tapered silence in hopes for but a single smear of gossip.
Because you've conquered everything.
Or rather, all the things that matter enough to make up my proverbial "everything".
You exist in the backdrop of my lids, splattered as paint to a kaleidoscopic mural til the phosphenes bleed out of hues.
Every stolen breath by you--- returned--- bated and tainted in chilled apologies. Things that can't afford to matter.
And when these subtle arts emerge, the stage opens up to unveil a playback of memories this toiling brain could do without.
Silly, little things--- listless and idle in hopes of the callbacks.
But the curtains swept to a closing embrace so long ago, the spotlight barely filtering through resolve's jagged crevices.
And if I could hold you, see you, tell you one last time just how beautiful you are...
How much you mean to me... How essential to my being you honestly are, could you imagine the mad dash I'd make for that chance?
Because I would do it, for you. If it meant bringing you back...
I'd do it.

For you, I would...

But then the mirror would break.