just a fyi for future reasons

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Created Jan 16, 2014 11:54:15

Just in case I just dissappear one day and not reply for an extend amount of days over the next week, I'm going to give you guys the reason right now so you guys won't think I'm ditching or something -- cause I honestly am not.

A friend of mine died yesterday morning. I'm not so sure if I should say friend. It's sort of loose due to the fact I haven't seen her in months since she graduated and her and I weren't personal friends on any level. She was someone i spoke to in between classes or whenever I'm at the library at my school. Nothing close, nothing tight.

Despite that, I'm not sure whether or not right now I'm feeling not as upset as I should be because I'm sort of... letting it hit me or because I seirously didn't knew her well enough to cry over her passing. She was a great person though- really sweet. Sometimes she got on my nerves, but honestly. my nerves are far too easy to get on orz. She was very talented though. She's also the kind of person in which you can say negative things towards her and she'll either brush it off or take it positively. I just honestly never expected her to pass - especially this soon. It's slightly scary to think about since she's no more than a year or two older than me.

So yeah. I'm just. really. bland about it right now. Unsure how I'm feeling and unsure as to whether or not it really struck me yet. orz. I didn't find out until an hour or two ago. But yeah- If I just happen to disappear and not reply for two or three days, that's the reason. I'm not upset at any of you guys nor am I ignoring anyone so don't you guys worry about those things. *u*'

above all, I'll definitely be fine so don't worry about me either. orz. I'm just. going through the whole ... you know. idk. am i suppose to be more emotional than this? sorta phase.

But yeah. ouo' cough. I'm going to go get back to work. My boss told me I could go home but honestly, orz... I procrastinate enough without a reason.

thanks for uh. reading though if you guys did. orz I don't mean to dampen your day with bad news or anything, just wanted to state this clear so none of you guys assume that I'm going off and ditching you.

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justashadow 10 years ago

QQ I haven't replied yet but
I hope you feel better..there's been a lot of ..incidents lately and ..I'm not sure on how to react either. I studied the stages of grief though, in English o.o maybe its shock right now? You don't know how to deal with it at first, then it hits you..and the next stage you'll miss her and be mad at her and everything..well, depends on your relationship with her. Anyways, just make sure to keep talking to people..holding it back isn't good and I'm here for you ;; <3

jellybean 10 years ago

It's okay Sweet. *cuddles* It's not weird to feel slightly apathetic to it, and bland. It's quite normal actually.

I went through a similar thing a few years ago. One of the guys I had gone to school with died. And I reacted pretty much the same as you are. I just sort of accepted it, and I wasn't really that much affected. Only when I was at his funeral did it hit me, and that was only because they showed a picture of him in his school uniform which was just how I remembered him. But even then, it hit me fast but I got over it fairly quickly too.

So don't worry about your reaction being odd, okay? Because it's really not. Just if it does start to affect you, make sure you don't try to hold it in. Just go with it, okay?

*cuddles*