cafe

@mark tuan /turns my head to look at the window, watching people on the streets below, keeping quiet for a while as I try to arrange words to try and make some sense before I dare speak
I'm just... disappointed
I thought i had gotten better at it. Not holding people to high standards
And I have, for most people I'm indifferent
/pauses, our drinks arriving and while I would usually plough into my strawberry milk, I just stare at it and then finally speak again
But when it's a friend?
I'm not quite hollow enough to not care about when they disappoint me and, what seems inevitable, hurt me
And I get it. People mess up, friends certainly, but when its multiple times it makes me feel... lonely. Like I'm alone, even to the ones I've genuinely opened up to and let in
/sighs, leaning back and looking out the window again, ruffling my own hair in frustration and putting on a smile
It will blow over. Again, until the next time. So I guess it's not a huge deal, hyung

@im jaebum /leans in my chair keeping my eyes on you as i can almost feel how hurt you are but dodnt wanna assume
Are you sure? /looks at you worriedly. Jaebum-ah, you know you can count on me.
Whats hurting you

@mark tuan /inhales deeply before i slowly let it out through my nose, leaning my head into my hand briefly before i give you a small shrug of my shoulders
nothing major, hyung
i'm just... i'm tired?
you know, the kind of tired that the best kind of sleep doesn't solve. i'm disappointed, hurt, and just a lot of little things in between

@im jaebum /glance back at you worriedly as i guide us to a seat in the corner sitting down
/observe you for a bit before speaking
Whats on your mind, Jaebum. You can tell me anything

@mark tuan Maybe, hyung
/follows you quietly, nodding my head gently before I give you another small smile and sit down with you
This is a good spot
What did you want to talk about hyung?

@im jaebum Its just your caring nature, Jaebum
/nods choosing a spot up stairs for uS
Lets sit ul here so we can talk better.

@mark tuan I guess that's true
I think I just forget sometimes. And when I remember I feel... bad
/shakes my head, pointing to one of the indoor tables
It's too cold outside
Can we stay in?

@im jaebum Leader also needs to be taken care of as well, Jaebum.
/smiles softly to reassure you. Just cause we're crazy kids most time doesnt mean we dont worry bout our Leader.
/takes the card pocketing it as we wait.
Shall we sit outside and talk?

@mark tuan ah but i can-
i'm leader after all
/feels guilty when you care for me, sighing softly to myself knowing i shouldn't feel that way
thank you
/mumbles as i take it when you're done, asking for a strawberry milkshake since i need something more comforting to me, paying with your card before i hand it back to you

@im jaebum Ani. Hyung will treat. /look overat you worriedly.
You seem to need it today /rubs your back gently. Come on.
/walks with you to the counter to order coffee for me as i wait for you to order before handing my card over

@mark tuan /arrives a little while after you, head ducked down low as i come in and find you, sitting opposite you at the table you've gotten us
/pulls off my mask and glasses slowly, revealing tired eyes and an even more tired smile but a smile nonetheless
thanks, hyung
order anything you want, i'll buy

@im jaebum /sitss and waits patiently for you