⁝ seo manor.

@✿ chae seongyeom Eunjeong’s heart raced as she felt his hand gently grasp hers, the warmth it had made her feel a stark contrast to the chill that she should have undeniably felt from his touch. She could hear the desperation in Seongyeom’s voice, the unspoken plea for a chance to make amends and to bridge the chasm that had formed between them in the wake of their separation. But even as her heart yearned to heed his call, her mind remained steadfast in its resolve to enforce the lines that the divorce should have long drawn between them.

With great effort, she withdrew her hand from the man’s grasp, her gaze remaining resolutely ahead as she struggled to maintain her stance. She could feel his fixed gaze upon her, and try as she might, the governess could not bring herself to meet his eyes for she was afraid of what she might find lurking within their depths.

There is a silence between them, the only sound the steady rhythm of the rain as it drummed against the windows. And then, Seongyeom spoke once more, his words a whispered prayer carried on the wind.

“Nothing needs to change,” he murmured, his voice barely audible above the roar of the storm. “Unless you wish it.”

Eunjeong’s heart constricted at his words and she found herself at a loss for what to say, her body reacting before she could control it. But as she turned to face him and her eyes inevitably met his, she was transported back to a time when they were still husband and wife . . . bound together by a love that had once felt unbreakable. Despite her best efforts to remain aloof, she could not suppress the flood of memories that crashed over her, each one a bittersweet reminder of the seven years they had spent together.

For a fleeting moment, she was tempted to give in to the longing that pulsed through her veins and to lose herself in the comfort of his embrace once more. Yet, how utterly selfish would she be to focus on the echoes of their shared past instead of focusing on the reality of their present?

With a small shake of her head, she replies, “everything has already changed.”

(For as she looked into Seongyeom’s eyes and saw the pain reflected there, she knew that both of them had lost more than just a husband or a wife — they had lost pieces of their own souls.)

With a heavy sigh, the woman turned away once more, unable to bear the weight of his stare any longer. “I apologize, Duke Chae,” she murmured. "However, I must ask you to leave. The sun is beginning to set and it is not appropriate for you to be here right now.”

@❀ seo eunjeong The grey clouds continued to roll above, quickly darkening the blue sky and chasing away the bright yet sparingly warm rays of the sun. Beneath it, Seongyeom paced restlessly. Despite nowing the likely outcome of his request, hope still flickered stubbornly within him, like a flame battling against the gusts of a winter wind. After a few, the servant reappeared with an apologetic look, relaying the news that Eunjeong did not wish to meet him and perhaps it would be best if he would come another day, when the weather is in his favour.

Seongyeom shook his head. "I will wait," he declared firmly, voice cutting through the chilly air. The servant, with a hesitant bow, draw the gates close once more. Left to his own devices, the Duke let out a deep breath as he stood facing the Seo residence. Soft, cool taps landed on his head and shoulders as began to drizzle. Seongyeom paid it no attention as he rooted himself on the ground, as if declaring war with the heavens.

The heavens did not relent as it poured harder. Even as small droplets of rain grew into plump and freezing drops that mercilessly poured from above and pelting furiously on him, Seongyeom had no plans to seek shelter. Soon, his hanbok was soaked, the intensity of the rain leaving nothing dry. The temperature seeping through his skin, battling the warmth and eventually causing his body to be at the mercy of the cold. Still, Seongyeom remain standing. Come hail or scorching heat, he'll stay until the gates will open for him in acceptance.

Had he been this determined to protect her then, would they be here now?

The thought brought on a slight smirk to his trembling lips. "Foolish Gyeom", he can hear her say. He pictured her eyebrows knit together with worry, voice softly chiding yet laced with a fondness even to such a difficult side of him. He closed his eyes, willing himself to hold on to her image to keep him standing. Truly, he is a fool—was, is and will always be. When the cold droplets no longer sentenced him to freeze yet the sound of rain remain, Seongyeom opened his eyes. He lifted his head to take in the figure of the very woman he had wished to see.

"Eun—Eunjeong," he murmured in disbelief through the chattering of his teeth. "My lady, I—" The man, sensing her dismay, was quick to keep his words at bay as she led him into the residence. Silence enveloped them yet Seongyeom revelled in it. In his wake, without the assist of alcohol and a fever dream, Eunjeong was with him. And he did not let her leave out of his sight, his brown orbs following her every movement, except for when she ushered him to change his soaked clothes with a spare. Soon, he was sitting next to her, the familiar warmth in a close proximity against his side until it was ripped away as Eunjeong distanced herself.

"Eunjeong, wait," he began in haste, catching her hand, warm against his cold one. "I will—I will leave even if the rain has not stopped," the Duke promised, "but if you would spare a bit of your time. . ."

Seongyeom stood, letting her hand go gently. He gazed at her familiar figure, turned away from him. His heart squeezed for he recalled seeing the back of her head often during the days prior to her leaving. Yet the Duke did not dare to ask for more. "You do not even need to face me," he continued, despite wishing that he could learn of her expressions as he speaks.

He paused, gathering courage to say the next few words hoping it will not become a prayer. Simply words to let Eunjeong he was here to seek forgiveness and convey a lifetime of gratefulness for taking care of him during the plague. "And nothing needs to change," he whispered, his voice battling with the sound of rain. Then a bit louder, laced with ardent hope, "Unless you wish it."

@✿ chae seongyeom The day had unfolded in an uncharacteristically quiet manner, the tranquility of the estate a stark departure from the relentless tumult that had consumed Eunjeong since the latest edition of Lady Mugunghwa’s Society Papers had once again her private life into the spotlight. It had been over two years since her name had last graced its pages, and yet the vulnerability she felt at having her private life laid bare once again was as palpable as ever.

Everywhere she turned, she was met with probing inquiries and speculative whispers, each one chipping away at the fragile façade of her composure. Had she reconciled with her ex-husband? Was their divorce merely a ruse? The assumptions grew more outlandish with each passing day, and she couldn’t escape them even within the confines of her own home. Her parents, too, had joined the chorus of voices urging her to reconcile with her ex-husband, their well-meaning but misguided advice only adding to her distress.

If it was this exhausting for her, she could not imagine the consequences the gossip would have on Seongyeom. What would his mother say? What if her actions had lasting repercussions on his political ambitions or jeopardized his prospects for future alliances? What if she had inadvertently sabotaged his chances of finding happiness with someone else? The thought alone was enough to send a shiver down her spine. Eunjeong would not be able to forgive herself if so.

As irony would have it, it was in the midst of this inner turmoil that the unexpected knock came at her door, the servant’s hesitant voice breaking through the quiet of her thoughts. The news that Duke Chae of Pyeongchang was currently standing outside the gates and asking to speak to her caught the governess off guard, her mind reeling with a maelstrom of conflicting emotions. Why would he seek her out now, especially after everything that had transpired between them? And why would the household staff entertain such a request, knowing full well the implications it could have?

As if the servant could read her thoughts, they inform her that the sky outside looks gloomy and it is believed that it will rain soon; thus, would it not be better for them to take the Duke in and let him stay lest he catch a cold? While this tugged at her heartstrings, Eunjeong ultimately refused to meet with him. Her thoughtlessness in wanting to care for him during his time of need had seemed to backfire, bringing them both back to square one as if they were just freshly divorced yet again. In the end, it was fear that won out over compassion, fear of the consequences that their reunion might unleash. She could not risk another misunderstanding. It was for the best, she told herself, even as the heavens opened up and the rain began to fall in earnest.

An hour passed in silence as Eunjeong sat alone in her room, the sound of rain against the windows a constant reminder of the choice she had made. Yet, despite her efforts to push him from her mind, her thoughts inevitably turned to Seongyeom. Surely, he would have left by now, she reasoned, but a nagging sense of unease in the pit of her stomach tugged at her conscience. And when she finally mustered the courage to venture outside, umbrella in hand, her worst fears were realized in the form of a solitary figure standing at the gates.

To her dismay, there was her ex-husband, drenched and visibly shaken from the cold, yet determined to remain steadfast in his resolve. Without a second thought, Eunjeong covered him with her umbrella and led him inside the gates, nothing but pure concern for his well-being overriding any reservations she had as if on autopilot. It is only after she has had him change into a spare set of her father’s clothing and sit by the brazier in her annex that she registers what she has done.

Immediately, she scoots away from him and stands up, turning away to leave him alone but not before informing him, “this . . . this does not change anything.” She murmurs, her gaze averted as she struggles to maintain her composure, “I expect you to leave once it stops raining outside.”

@❀ seo eunjeong ᨒ [ ʙᴀᴄᴋᴅᴀᴛᴇᴅ ] ʟᴀᴛᴇ ᴊᴀɴᴜᴀʀʏ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ʏᴇᴀʀ 1869
⸺

With his horse left at the public stables, Seongyeom walked the rest of the way through the cluster of residences. The gravelled earth beneath his feet whispered familiarity as he approached the Seo Manor, each step a reunion with memories etched into the very fabric of the pathway. He lived through it as he drew closer yet a certain scene resembled the present: the proposal. The very day he showed up with the intention of asking for Seo Eunjeong’s hand in marriage felt like yesterday. Anxiety that coursed through his veins was so intense, matching the surety of his decision to have Eunjeong as his wife.

Today, his intentions remain the same as it was that fateful years ago. To take her as wife, once more. Seongyeom knows this time, however, the path would not be as flowery as it was back then. A storm would brew, heavy grey clouds would roll in his path much like the ones covering the blue sky at the moment. However, before even considering asking if she would return to stand by him, the Duke wanted to redeem himself, to get down on his knees and apologise, until he is deserving to be a man worthy to love her.

Seongyeom’s heart ached knowing how much time he had wasted. Three excruciatingly long years. Truly, he was far too late. Her silence in those three years. . .was it not proof of her determination to never see nor speak to him again? Was he being selfish, as he has always been, to be ignoring her wishes and come uninvited into her life again? Would it be foolish to rely on one single truth he has learnt from his staff and confirmed by his sister–to hope that she shared his feelings, still?

When he arrived, the estate felt more imposing than ever. The Duke stood frozen in front of the thick wooden outer gates, his arm anchored by his side for one, two, three seconds before he lifted it. Hesitations held the uplifted arm for a few moments longer before Seongyeom finally announced his presence with three, heavy knocks. He waited with bated breath, rehearsing words he would convey and hoping his tongue would remember even if his brain would not. The eldest of the Chaes stepped back from the gates as he caught sounds of footsteps approaching in haste. He fixed his gat and straightened his posture as he waited. After a few heartbeats, the gate opened to reveal a servant.

Judging by the eyes, wide as an alert rabbit's, and the immediate bow of her head, the servant recognised the Duke yet he was compelled to introduce himself without title as he is but a man about to pursue another chance with the woman who held his heart. "I am Chae Seongyeom, first son of the Chae, House of the Black Tortoise." His introduction was met with a nod of acknowledgement and given the servant did not directly turn him away (he had partly expected them to as they had every time he came over to ask of Eunjeong), he continued to state his purpose.

“I wish to speak to the Lady of the House," Seongyeom announced, the loud thrumming of his heart causing him to repeat himself, unsure if he had even said it right,"I wish to speak to Lady Seo Eunjeong.”

Seo Eunjeong, once the woman who shared his family name, still the owner of his undying affections.

@✿ song jinye She met Jinye's concerned gaze with a mixture of frustration and a touch of resignation. It was true that the intricacies of Joseon's political landscape often dictated the paths certain individuals had to tread, especially when the alliances between influential families could shape the destiny of their nation. This clash between traditional practices and the innate human desire for genuine happiness was a conundrum that had plagued the upper echelon for generations. And while it was a reality both women were familiar with, it didn't mean they had to be complacent in the face of it.

"I know, I know," Eunjeong conceded with a sigh, acknowledging the harsh reality of the world they lived in. "But sometimes, I cannot help but wonder if the price we pay for these alliances is too high. Duke Jin is already the Right State Councillor... with the power he already wields, I cannot justify him selling out his own daughter."

She nodded at her friend's question, confirming that she had indeed spoken with the young lady. "I have, eonni. She seems willing to fulfill this duty and has not voiced any discontent. It seems her desire is solely to bring happiness to her father and, in turn, secure her family's standing. It is a burden too heavy for someone so young. Then again, the decision has been made, and we are merely spectators to this unfolding tale. It is already out of my hands."

Shaking her head, Eunjeong reached for a snack on the tray before them and urged the other to do the same. "Have a bite, please. These are too delightful to be left to grow cold."

The two shared a moment savoring the flavors of the pastries, letting the weight of the conversation settle between them before they drifted onto other topics, reminiscent of times when their laughter echoed as they found solace in each other's company once more.

[ fin. ]

@❀ seo eunjeong She listened closely to her dear friend's words, each whisper and tone conveyed a tale of intrigue. Such talks about the Jins always seemed to keep Jinye fascinated and curious. Her family and the Jins were like water and oil, neither mixed well in politics or private affairs. Then again, there had never been hostility between them, it was merely so quiet tension that rippled between the walls of the room whenever they were in proximity.

Jinye has not heard much about the children of the family, so when Eunjeong brought up Young Lady Jin and her agreement to an engagement done for strategic alliances, a slight glower formed on her chin. The idea of marrying for political ties rather than love bothered her deeply. Marriage, as she believed it, should always be a union born out of genuine love and connection for the other person.

Although it was not her place to have a say in the Jin family’s business, she had always been a romantic at heart, and the prospect of Young Lady Jin’s betrothal left a bitter taste in . With a heavy sigh, she could only slightly voice her concerns. “In the world we live in, such arrangements are not uncommon, especially for those in assembly who wish to solidify their positions through such unions."

Her thoughts lingered on the young Jin daughter. She wondered if the young girl harbored dreams and desires of her own, or if the weight of familial and even societal expectations bore down on her as it did for Jinye when she was around the same age as Young Lady Jin. Her mind traveled back to her own youth, a time when dreams of love and adventure filled her thoughts. Her engagement with Lord Namgong had also been an arrangement and she did fall in love with him over the course of getting to know him but the cycle of political marriages has been woven into the tapestry of their country for far too long. And Jinye fears these traditions may outlive them and that is why it deeply affected her.

“Have you talked with Young Lady Jin about it?” Her gaze fixed on Eunjeong with genuine concern. “It feels like a compromise of her happiness, especially to someone she’s not sure she will love but more importantly to someone who may not be able to understand the depths of her heart. It just seems so unfair."

@✿ song jinye She raised an eyebrow at Jinye's playful evasion, recognizing the art of diverting a conversation. It was a skill both of them had honed over the years, a silent agreement to navigate the dance around matters of the heart with a certain level of discretion. She decided not to press further, content with the understanding that some topics were still tender ground and that it was time for the shadows of the past to retreat.

As the attention shifted to her endeavors as a governess, Eunjeong couldn't help but lean in with a conspiratorial grin. "Oh, you won't believe the twists and turns of this recent chapter," she began, a glint of amusement in her eyes. "I initially thought I was to prepare Young Lady Jin for her debut, as her age renders her eligible for the next social season. That was actually the reason I accepted, as the girl has the potential to become the Diamond. However, it has come to my knowledge that Duke Jin has other plans."

Her voice took on the form of a whisper, as if they were out in public and she needed to safeguard the secret that would tumble out of her lips next. "It seems he is intent on orchestrating a strategic marriage for his daughter. A move that makes sense in the world of politics, I suppose, for alliances and whatnot. But, you know me, eonni. I have always been a firm believer in letting true love find its own course."

Eunjeong's expression became thoughtful, a trace of sadness lingering in her eyes. "It is quite a peculiar situation. I want to guide and support Young Lady Jin in her choices, but her right to choose has been stripped away. She is the apple of her father's eye, and is willing to go through with this. She has not even met the man she will call her husband yet. I can only hope for the best, that maybe affection will weave its way into her story, even if it does start as a calculated move. Perhaps I am being foolish, But every heart deserves a chance to seek its match, does it not?"

She paused for a moment, her gaze drifting to the window as if seeking solace in the outside world. "In any case, navigating the intricacies of noble families always keeps me on my toes."

@❀ seo eunjeong Jinye's eyes held a sense of gentleness as she listened to Eunjeong's sincere words. From the year the dove flew away from her cage to the day the snow covered the delicate footprints that the governess sought to leave behind, their shared history had been drawn with lines that were both beautiful and tragic. Despite the intricacies of their past, there was an unwavering sense of respect they had for the choices each of them had made.

Through the years, Jinye had consistently admired Eunjeong’s resilience. Unlike the dove, the governess wove her path through the complexities of life with a strength that transcended heartache. Her ability to let go of love, even when its echoes still lingered, was a strength Jinye herself had not fully grasped. Like a migrating bird that left in winter, she continued to hold onto a love that had taken flight to the skies.

In the silence that followed, Jinye’s gaze lingered on her friend’s beautiful profile. They were two women who had weathered the seasons of life, both bearing burdens and triumphs. However, Jinye’s respect for Eunjeong’s wisdom tugged at the corners of her heart. The comparisons between their decisions stirred a bittersweet melancholy in her soul.

"Eunjeong, your strength and grace never cease to amaze me," her voice carried a mixture of admiration and empathy. "To let go of love is a bravery only very few know of and I admire you for making the decision that allows you to keep your dignity intact. There is so much I can learn from you."

As the topic shifted toward lighter matters, Jinye's expression softened into a subtle smile. The mention of romantic prospects, however, brought a playful glint to her eyes. "Ah, romantic prospects in my life? You overestimate the time I have outside of work. My days are filled with reports, meetings, and the chaotic debates of politics."

She chuckled lightly as she considered the demands of her position. "The only romantic endeavors I witness are the tales spun by my friends, much like the intriguing stories you share. My heart, for now, is dedicated to the affairs of the Queen's assembly, and the idea of romance must patiently wait their turn in line."

Her words held a touch of amusement, but beneath it lingered a subtle evasion of a deeper truth. The complexities of her own heart, buried beneath layers of duty and responsibility, were not a topic she was ready to unravel. Jinye steered the conversation away from the shadows of the past, finding solace in their shared laughter and the lighthearted exchange of stories.

"Eunjeong, you must share more tales of your endeavors as a governess. How has your recent client been faring?" Jinye was genuinely curious about the challenges her friend faced in her role, especially when her clients are the Jins.

@✿ song jinye [ no need to apologize at all my ♥️ ]

She felt her heart constrict slightly as Jinye delicately broached the topic of her ex-husband. It was an inevitable conversation, one that she had expected to come up at some point of her visit, but that had done little to prepare her. Memories of their past were a delicate tapestry, woven with both fond memories and painful threads, and revisiting it always brought a mix of emotions. Nevertheless, the governess understood that her friend's intentions were pure and that honesty was the only path to follow.

"Eonni, you never need to apologize for caring. Your concern means the world to me, and I am always grateful for your insight," Eunjeong responded, her gaze meeting Jinye's with sincerity. She knew that the other woman would not bring up a topic as heavy as this one without mulling it over, and her friend had done so in a way that did not encroach on her boundaries. She took a breath, her thoughts gathering as she prepared to share her feelings.

"I will not deny that there is love that lingers," she admitted. "Seven years of marriage is a long time, and the memories forged in that time cannot be easily erased. But love, as I have come to understand, does not always mean staying together. Sometimes it means letting go, for the sake of both parties."

With a pause, she chose her next words very carefully. "Gyeo— Duke Chae... has achieved much in the political arena since our divorce. He has risen to great heights, and I am genuinely happy for his accomplishments. He has always been so deserving of being an important voice within the Queen's assembly, and I believe he will be the changemaker that our country needs. With that said, however, I believe he will find a more suitable match. A lovely yangban woman with titles and assets, someone who can provide the political alliance and heirs he needs to secure his legacy. A woman more well-equipped to stand at his side, so she can dwell in support of his ambitions as well."

She chose not to voice the unspoken truth that lingered beneath the surface—the truth that still haunted her, the realization that she could never fulfill those expectations. Not in the seven years she had spent by his side, and most certainly not now.

But Eunjeong didn't dwell on the somber note for long. Forcing a smile, she steers the conversation toward lighter territory. "So, you have met interesting people at the office. Any romantic prospects among them, my dear friend?" She raised an eyebrow, teasingly curious, hoping to lighten the mood and move away from the complexities of her own history.

@❀ seo eunjeong [omggg i'm so late to this reply T T </3]

Jinye chuckled softly at Eunjeong's gratitude, her eyes reflecting the warmth in the treasured bond between them. She felt a sense of fulfillment in being able to support her dear friend. "No need for such sentiments, my dear friend. We've weathered storms together and that's what true friends do. I feel as if your struggles are mine as well, and your victories also bring me a sense of joy."

She considered the mundane activities that's taken up majority of her time: work, most of all. Leaning back, Jinye let out a thoughtful sigh. "Work, you know, has kept me quite occupied lately. The responsibilities that come with being an officer is demanding, to say the least." She paused, her gaze momentarily distant as she reflected on the weight of her duties. "But working at the office has also allowed me to meet many interesting people."

As the conversation shifted towards the people she's met in relation to her job, Jinye couldn't help but acknowledge the elephant in the room–or rather, at the office, where she has occasionally crossed paths with the Duke from the House of the Black Tortoise. Chae Seongyeom’s unexpected appearances had become a routine occurrence for Jinye and his inquiries about Eunjeong's well-being often lingered in the air.

Her expression became thoughtful as she decided to broach the subject delicately. "You know, Eunjeong, I ran into Duke Chae the other day at the office," she shared, her tone calm and cautious as she was unsure if bringing him up would open old wounds for her dear friend. "He asked about how you have been lately. I thought you should know." She chose her words carefully, "I can tell that he genuinely cares about your happiness, Eunjeong."

Sitting forward in her chair with a soft sigh, Jinye regarded Eunjeong with a mixture of concern and curiosity. "I'm not suggesting anything or trying to interfere in your life. Your decisions are your own, and I respect them. But, well, Duke Chae doesn't strike me as a terrible person. His love for you, in its own way, seems... sincere and unwavering.”

She reached out, warmly patting her friend’s hand, “do you truly have no more lingering feelings for him? I don't mean to pry, I just want to ensure that your heart is at peace with the decisions you've made." Jinye's eyes softened, a genuine concern etched on her features. “I won't press the matter further if you'd rather not discuss it, but I felt it necessary to share my perspective."

@✿ song jinye Eunjeong’s heart swelled with gratitude as she listened to Jinye. She knew that her friend had her own share of heartaches, and the fact that Jinye could extend such unconditional support despite her own pains filled the younger woman with deep appreciation. It was also a profound relief to hear her dear friend’s support and validation of her choices. It was no small feat to open up about such deeply personal matters, but she found solace in the fact that her dearest friend could understand her struggles.

“You are a true gem, eonni,” she whispered, her voice filled with genuine warmth. “I cannot express how grateful I am for your understanding and your unwavering support. You have always gone above and beyond for the people you love, and your capacity for compassion and your strength amaze me every day. I don’t know what I did to deserve someone as wonderful as you in my life but I am so blessed to. I can only hope to be as dependable a friend to you as you have been to me.”

As she looked into her friend’s eyes, Eunjeong’s thoughts couldn’t help but wander off to the conversations that might have taken place between Jinye and her ex-husband. She knew that her Seongyeom had been a constant presence at the palace, and the temptation to inquire about his ex-wife’s whereabouts must have been strong. Yet, Jinye had never brought up her encounters with him, nor had she complained about being in the middle of such delicate matters. Instead, the older woman had been a steadfast guardian of Eunjeong’s secrets above all else.

“Truly . . . what did I do to deserve a friend like you, eonni?” The governess mused with a wistful smile. “You have a heart of gold.” She smiled, a glimmer of hope dancing in her eyes as she gently squeezed Jinye’s hand. “We have indeed walked difficult paths but they have made us who we are. I cherish every moment we share, and I believe that together, we can find contentment in the choices we make.”

“Enough about my troubles,” she said, determined to steer the conversation away from the melancholy of their past and the weight of their secrets. The governess wanted to focus on the brighter aspects of their lives and the hope for the future. A warm smile graced her lips as she shifted their discussion to a more cheerful topic, leaning in across the table with a playful sparkle in her eyes.

“I’ve missed you so much, eonni. I’m delighted to hear that you’ve been venturing beyond the Song estate more often. Your letters have left me with a sense of wanderlust and curiosity. Please, tell me about your new experiences and encounters you’ve had. Entertain me with your stories about the places you’ve visited and the people you’ve met, for I am eager to share in your joys and experiences.”

@❀ seo eunjeong Jinye listened to Eunjeong's words with a heavy heart, her thoughts drifting back to the painful memories of her own lost love, Lord Namgong. She had known Eunjeong for many years, and they were years filled with their shared joys and sorrows, their secrets and dreams. She had always admired the younger woman’s resilience and strength, but she understood that everyone had their moments of vulnerability.

As she squeezed Eunjeong's hand in a comforting gesture, she spoke softly, her voice filled with understanding. "My dear friend, you should never feel ashamed of your choices. We each carry our own burdens, and you've faced challenges that no one else can truly comprehend. I've seen your unwavering love for Duke Chae, and I respect your decision to keep yourself safe from a past that still haunts you."

Jinye's gaze turned distant for a moment and she couldn't help but recall the bittersweet memories of her own tragic love story. Lord Namgong had always remained a large aspect of her life, and their short love had been torn apart beyond their control. He had passed for many years now, and Jinye had done all she could to carry the promises of her unfulfilled love.She had loved him with all her heart and he may be the only man she would ever love in this life. The pain that still lingered in the crevices of her heart was a wound that may never truly heal. So, she understood the lengths to which one might go to escape the clutches of the past, to find refuge in a world where the pain was less sharp, to come to peace with what once was and what could have been.

Her voice carried the weight of her own experiences as she spoke. "Eunjeong, I've known the depths of longing and the pain of lost love. And I, too, have made choices that keep me apart from Lord Namgong," Jinye confessed, her voice tinged with melancholy at having lost count of how many days passed when she swore a last promise to never return to his graveside. "And like you, my dear friend, I carry my own regrets. But I have come to accept that life is not always kind. Sometimes we must do what is necessary to protect ourselves.”

Jinye smiled, a bittersweet acknowledgment of the life they had both lived. "We have both walked difficult paths," she said. Her eyes reflected a blend of sorrow and hope, “I do not hold it against you. In fact, I support your decision to find solace and security in a place where your past cannot reach you, especially when you aren’t ready."

With a small, sad smile, Jinye added, "I may never see Lord Namgong again in this lifetime, but I wouldn't wish that kind of agony on anyone. I hope that your time at the Jin estate brings you the peace and safety you seek. You have always been there for me, Eunjeong, and I will always support you, no matter the path you choose."

@✿ song jinye As the conversation flowed and the tea was sipped in the comforting silence that enveloped them, Eunjeong noticed the subtle change in Jinye’s expression when she mentioned her current employment. The strained relationship between the Jins and the Songs had escaped her notice, so the tension between the two families had not been a source of consideration for her. However, the younger woman could sense the unease in her friend’s demeanor and was quick to pick up on her caution.

She had always been aware of the rumors and whispers that swirled around the powerful family, the House of the Haetae. After all, it was impossible not to know about the notorious Duke Jin Jaeha of Ganghwa and his turbulent past. The scandalous love triangle involving the Duke, his former Duchess, and her illicit affair had been the talk of Joseon society for years. This tangled web of politics and personal affairs had cast a dark cloud over the family’s name, making their acquaintance an unorthodox choice for someone like Eunjeong. The implications of her position were not lost on the former duchess and she knew that her connections could have significant consequences. While she had never been one to let gossip dictate her judgments, she also knew that there was no smoke without fire.

Yet the governess had not taken her decision lightly when she accepted the princess of the Jin household as her next jewel to perfect. She knew that the association might raise questions and doubts, but she also believed in giving individuals the benefit of the doubt. Her primary role was to nurture and educate the young women of a household, and it seemed unfair to pass judgment on the next generation for the actions of their parents. Thus, Eunjeong appreciated Jinye’s understanding and gratitude. Her friend’s support was a precious gift, a soothing balm to her own apprehensions and doubts about her current position.

She squeezed her friend’s hand in response, appreciating the genuine care in the older woman’s eyes, and took a moment to choose her words carefully. She valued Jinye’s trust and willingness to support her despite the circumstances. The world outside might be tumultuous, but in this room, with Jinye’s presence, all was right and comforting. “I, too, had my reservations, eonni,” Eunjeong admitted, her voice quiet and contemplative. “But I assure you that working for the House of Haetae is a decision that I didn’t make lightly. I have heard all the whispers, all the tales of the Duke’s questionable character, and the history of the house. However, I also firmly believe that it is not my place to judge the daughter for the sins of her parents.”

Eunjeong sighed heavily, her eyes carrying a flicker of vulnerability as she continued, “I... I must also admit that my decision to work at the Jin estate isn’t purely altruistic. You know of my estranged marriage... the Jin estate in Hanseong is the last place he would look for me, given their constant clashes in the royal assembly.”

As the governess admitted her ulterior motive, her voice wavered with a mix of shame and vulnerability. She knew it was a decision clouded by her desire to maintain her distance from her past, even though she had the privilege of being with the love of her life — a luxury that Jinye had been denied by the cruel hand of fate.

Eunjeong felt a wave of guilt wash over her. The contrast was so stark, and she couldn’t help but feel pathetic in comparison. She looked back into Jinye’s eyes, her own filled with remorse. “I feel ashamed to admit such a selfish reason to you, eonni, especially when I know the depth of your longing for Lord Namgong. It’s a decision I’ve made, but I understand if it disappoints you. I know you would do anything to see orabeoni once more, and here I am, making choices that continue to keep me apart from Gyeom. You’ve always been so strong, my dear friend, and I hope you can forgive me for my own moment of weakness.”

@❀ seo eunjeong Jinye had always admired Eunjeong's unwavering support and friendship, and hearing her kind words now filled her heart with warmth and gratitude. She had missed her friend terribly during her time away. Every year it felt as if the first snow couldn't come fast enough, and with it, the joy of reuniting with her dearest friend. Jinye smiled as she thought back to all of the happy memories they shared. Now, having Eunjeong by her side at this moment was as if a piece of her heart had been restored.

"Thank you, Eunjeong," she replied, her voice filled with genuine gratitude. "Your words mean more to me than you can imagine. It's friends like you who give me the strength to keep pushing forward, even when the world seems so challenging." Her friend's words about change and growth struck a chord with her, and she nodded in agreement. "You're right, my friend. Change is necessary for growth, even if it's unsettling."

The touch of Eunjeong's hand on hers brought a warm smile to Jinye's face, and she returned the reassuring squeeze. She knew that even if the world outside was unpredictable, her friend's unwavering support would be a constant source of solace in every storm. "I'm grateful to have you by my side, Eunjeong. It makes everything all the more bearable."

She sipped her tea as she listened to her friend's recent adjustments to her return to the capital, although one thing caught her off guard. It turned out that her dear friend's current employment was with the Jins, a family closely tied to the very political adversaries of the Songs. Jinye's surprise was evident as the strained relationship between the Jins and the Songs was like a rivalry woven together with barbed wires as the tension had been simmering for some time. She had an uneasy feeling that the boiling point between the two families was destined to erupt into serious conflict. She only hoped that the tension wouldn't tear her and Eunjeong apart, for it would be a tragedy to be separated from her dearest friend in a senseless clash of egos.

Calmly, she set her teacup down and drew a deep breath. She didn't want to bring negativity into their conversation, especially after Eunjeong had shared such heartfelt sentiments. However, she couldn't help but wonder about the implications of her friend's current position as the political landscape was treacherous and their connections could carry significant consequences. Duke Jin, especially, had been quite violent in his pursuit of power, often resorting to extreme measures to gain an advantage over his rivals. Jinye shuddered at the thought of what he might do if he were to find out about Eunjeong's friendship with her, especially when Jinye's hand had played a significant role in tearing the Jin family apart; a mistake that still haunts her.

"Yes, I'm familiar with them," she responded cautiously. "I must admit, I'm surprised to hear that you're working for the House of Haetae." Her gentle voice was tinged with concern, but she squeezed her friend's hand in return and smiled sincerely. "I trust your judgment, Eunjeong. I hope you've found a safe and fulfilling position with them. If you ever need anything, don't hesitate to ask me." In spite of the challenging times that lay ahead, Jinye prayed that her friend would remain safe and that their friendship would remain intact.

@✿ song jinye As she took sips of tea, her eyes shimmered with admiration as she listened to Jinye's account of her recent endeavors with rapt attention. She couldn't help but feel immense pride in Jinye, who had not only ventured into the political realm despite how unconventional it was for women of their time but had also taken an active role in the Citizen Taskforce to bring a dangerous criminal to justice. She had always known her friend to be a woman of strength and determination, unafraid to challenge societal norms and break the barriers that often held women like themselves back. Eunjeong had always known that if anyone could shatter the glass ceiling, it would be her dear Jinye.

"You have always been a force to be reckoned with, eonni," the governess remarked with a fond smile. "I have admired your resilient spirit for as long as I've known you and it is only fitting that you step into a vital role in our kingdom's affairs. You're a true changemaker, my friend, and I couldn't be happier for you." Her gaze is warm and encouraging as she continued, "and as for your involvement in the Citizen Taskforce, I already had a feeling. In fact, I would have been more surprised if you hadn't taken it upon yourself to aid in the investigation. It's in your nature to stand up for justice and make a difference. Dare I say, it might even be in your birthright." It is a reference to the other woman's lineage as a Song, with the House of the Dove having a rich history of assisting the governance of the nation. "I am so proud of everything you have accomplished and continue to do."

While she does not say it out loud, she is glad to see that her friend is blossoming out of the cocoon she's been hiding in since the death of Lord Namgong. As Jinye confessed how overwhelming the nature of her new life was, Eunjeong found herself nodding with empathy. "Change is certainly daunting, and I can only imagine how this transitional period of your life must be for you," she comments with understanding, hoping to validate the other woman's feelings. "But without change, we cannot have growth. It's through these transformations that we discover new aspects of ourselves. You have already achieved so much. I have no doubt that you will continue to find your place in this ever-evolving world and continue to make a profound impact on our society. You are not a lost child, but a remarkable woman who has faced adversity with grace." Eunjeong reached across the table, placing her hand on top of Jinye's with a reassuring squeeze. "And you must also do well to remember that I'm here for you, eonni, just as you have always been there for me. We have gone through many hardships in our lives together, and I'm confident that this time will be no different."

The younger woman couldn't help but shake her head at her friend's attempt to shift the conversation. "You could never dampen the mood, eonni. Your presence alone brings light and warmth to any room. I cherish our conversations, whether they're filled with laughter or contemplation, and my days are always enriched by your presence." With a warm smile, she continued, "Being back in Hanseong and knowing that I'm closer to you has brought both comfort and joy to my life. It makes me feel like I didn't make the wrong decision by coming back here." The last sentence she says is lower in volume—almost a whisper under her breath—but she knows Jinye would not miss it. "My move is still very new, so I do not have much to update you on, unfortunately. I now work for the Jins, House of the Haetae. I am not sure if that is a familiar name."

@❀ seo eunjeong Jinye can clearly remember the last time she was with her precious friend. It's been months since they saw each other. Their last meeting consisted of a daydream beneath the first snowfall of the year when the world was blanketed in peaceful reverie. Each reunion fills her with another yearning to return to simpler times; to dwell in their laughter and conversations. Whenever she encountered obstacles throughout their time apart from one another, she wished to return to Eunjeong's warmth and comfort.

Eunjeong's embrace provided her a sense of security and belonging. There was something uniquely comforting about her friend's embrace. She was certain that no matter how much time passed that feeling would remain the same through the years and Jinye was grateful for that.

"I've missed you too, dearest friend." Jinye said, "I'm also glad to see you are well. It's been so long. I've been so worried about how you've been doing and I'm just relieved to know that you're safe and happy."

As they moved to the seating area, Jinye allowed herself to be treated as a guest. She took a seat and watched as Eunjeong fluttered around the room, tending to her in a way that she couldn't help but smile. As she glanced at the table, she couldn't help but be impressed at how everything was meticulously prepared. The scent of freshly brewed tea and pastries indeed suited her tastes. She knew her friend was peculiar when it came to taking note of even the smallest details. Jinye's heart was filled with warmth; it was as if nothing had changed and their reunion was almost like no time had passed at all.

She gently lifted the porcelain cup to her lips, taking a sip of the warm tea. The flavor was new, but the sweetness gave it a familiar taste that she liked. She smiled with appreciation as she set the cup back down, thankful for the effort her friend had gone through to make her visit special.

"You have outdone yourself again, my dear friend," Jinye said. "All of this is exquisite. You always seem to know exactly how to make me feel welcome and cherished."

Yet, this reunion came earlier than the scheduled annual meeting. Jinye was rather in haste to catch up and share stories of what they had been up to, both the good and the bad. Jinye wanted to tell Eunjeong about her own successes and the new opportunities she had been presented with.

"Since our last reunion, much has happened." Jinye told Eunjeong about how she's been busy with her most recent job, working as an officer in the office for the inspector-general, as well as the work she's done with the citizen's task force to catch the perpetrator that cast a shadow over the city during the social season. She also told her friend about her adjustment to leaving the Song estate walls and venturing back into society after so many years. She had been making new acquaintances and making a name for herself, but at times she had found it overwhelming.

She couldn't help but sigh with a heavy feeling in her chest. Despite her age, she still feels like a lost child. "It's like I'm a completely new person," she said. "It's been a difficult journey to find my place in the world. I thought I had a plan, but it all seems to be changing, and I'm struggling to find my footing." Jinye's expression softened as she looked to Eunjeong for comfort and understanding.

Trying to lighten the atmosphere, Jinye quickly added, "But don't let me dampen the mood. How have your days been? I hope they have been lovely."

@✿ song jinye Eunjeong was seated in the drawing room of her parents’ manor in Hanseong, eyes looking down at her foot shaking anxiously under her chima as she awaited her dear friend. She’d been looking forward to their reunion since they first exchanged letters earlier that month since knowing that she would once again be close to Jinye was one of the more significant factors that had ultimately convinced her to move back to Hanseong for her job. Jinye had been one of her dearest friends, and leaving the older woman behind when she departed the capital three years ago had weighed heavily on Eunjeong’s heart.

The faint creaking of footsteps from the hallway had her head swiveling toward the door. She rose from her seat in anticipation, eyes lighting up with a mixture of excitement and delight as the door opened to reveal the silhouette she longed for. “Jinye eonni!” Eunjeong calls out tenderly, a bright smile on her face as she meets the other woman halfway. She looked into Jinye’s eyes, searching for any trace of distress or weariness, but found nothing but the familiar warmth that had always characterized their friendship. “May I?” she asks as she extends her arms, her eyes filled with platonic affection, seeking consent before she enveloped Jinye in a heartfelt embrace.

“Oh, eonni, I’ve missed you so much,” Eunjeong whispers softly against Jinye’s ears, “I was so worried . . . and I’m so relieved to see you look fine and well and healthy.” It filled her heart with contentment to see her dear friend once more, safe and sound, despite the unsettling events that had unfolded in the city.

After a moment, Eunjeong gently released Jinye from the hug and motioned towards the seating area. “Please, have a seat,” she invites warmly, leading the other woman to sit in one of the chairs surrounding a table where a spread of tea and snacks awaited them. “Freshly brewed, just for you. I know how much you like the smell,” she says as she pours a cup of the fragrant tea for Jinye. “Dongfang meiren. White-tip oolong. It is a new blend imported from Great Qing. It has a natural sweetness like honey, and I knew you had to try it when I first tasted it. I think you’ll appreciate this one.”

Eunjeong handed the white porcelain cup to her friend before she settled in her seat, pouring herself a cup as well as she continued naming the various delicacies in the spread in front of them. “They are all rather new creations, but I thought it wouldn’t hurt for us to try something new. They will keep us full as we catch up while dinner is being prepared. Now tell me, my dear friend, how have you been? I feel like there is much we need to catch up on, starting from what has been weighing on your heart since your last letter.”

@❀ seo eunjeong The maid servant led her through the halls of the lavish Seo estate manor. There were beautiful decorations and furnishings with every detail seemed to be carefully chosen to create an atmosphere of luxury and opulence. The maidservant, meanwhile, remained humble and unassuming as Jinye took a deep breath and followed the maid slowly. She took in sights she hadn't seen in awhile and with a heavy heart, she remembers the people she used to know and the life she used to lead, and feels a sudden surge of emotions.

For the past few years, Jinye has lived in seclusion, rarely leaving her house and avoiding contact with those who knew her before. However, she frequently sought out one person over the years: Seo Eunjeong, one of her longtime friends. She was a source of comfort for her and a confidante, providing her with a listening ear and a kind word in her times of need. Jinye found solace in their relationship which flourished over many years.

Seo Eunjeong was one of the only two people who knew of Jinye's whereabouts during the four years she secretly enlisted in the military. They shared an unbreakable bond, with a deep understanding of the hardships they faced and the courage they needed to face them. She had been there for Jinye when Lord Namgong's passing had come as a shock, and had been the one to send a letter to tell her about it. Seo Eunjeong was a constant source of support for Jinye. In her times of need, she was there to listen and provide a kind word.

Today, Jinye found the courage to seek her out, months earlier than their usual promised meeting. She was determined to finally break the silence and have a meaningful conversation with her friend. It had been months since she saw last saw her familiar face. She could feel her heart racing and her palms sweating as she was anxious to finally reunite with a friend who had been with her through thick and thin.

Many years ago, Jinye was a young girl who enjoyed spending time with her friends, laughed often, and dreamed of a bright future. But those memories are now tinged with sadness. She has become a woman with a different life and different dreams. The memories remain, but the scars do too.

The years have changed her and she now knows the pain and despair of life that comes with experience. She has seen the darkness, the pain of loss, and the struggles of change. She wonders, if things had turned out differently, would it have kept that part of her alive? Could she have remained the same person she was before, the one filled with laughter, joy, and hope? Or would she have still been irrevocably changed by her life events?

Finally, she arrived at a large mahogany door, which the maidservant opened to allow her entry. Jinye stepped into the room as a scent of freshly brewed tea wafting in the air filled the room. The maidservant did not enter the room, instead she closed the door behind to give them privacy.